Personal lubricant, usually just called lube, is one of those simple things that can make a surprisingly big difference. It adds glide, reduces friction and can make sex, masturbation and the insertion of some period or pelvic health products feel easier and more comfortable.
You don't need to be experiencing vaginal dryness to use it. Sometimes a little extra slip just feels better. Hormonal changes associated with genitourinary syndrome of menopause (GSM) can also make lubricant particularly helpful for some people.
The main thing is choosing a lubricant that works with whatever else you're using, whether that's a condom, toy, menstrual cup, disc or pelvic health device.
Key takeaways
- Lube can reduce friction and make sex and some internal products more comfortable.
- You don't need to have vaginal dryness to use it.
- Water-based lubricant is a good all-round starting point.
- Check compatibility if you're using condoms, toys, menstrual products or pelvic health devices.
- If sex or insertion regularly hurts, don't rely on lube to push through it. It's worth finding out what's causing the discomfort.
Contents
- What is personal lubricant?
- Why use lube?
- When might you use lubricant?
- Which type of lubricant should you choose?
- Which lubricants can you use with condoms?
- Can you use lube with a menstrual cup or disc?
- What about vaginal dilators and pelvic floor devices?
- What if you're trying to conceive?
- What if sex is still uncomfortable even with lube?
What is personal lubricant?
Personal lubricant is designed to add slip and reduce friction.
Our natural lubrication isn't the same every day. It can change with arousal, hormones, stress, breastfeeding, perimenopause, menopause, medicines and plenty of other things.
Sometimes you may feel naturally well lubricated and still prefer using lube. Other times, your body may feel drier than usual and a little extra glide can make a big difference.
Using lubricant doesn't mean anything is wrong with your body.
Is lubricant the same as a vaginal moisturiser?
Not quite.
Lubricant is mainly used when you want extra glide, such as during sex, masturbation or when inserting a product.
Vaginal moisturiser is generally used regularly to help with ongoing vaginal dryness, rather than just at the time you need extra lubrication.
If dryness is something you're dealing with regularly, read our guide to vaginal dryness or browse our vaginal moisturisers.
Why use lube?
It can make sex more comfortable
The biggest benefit is simple: less friction.
That can make vaginal or anal sex feel smoother and more comfortable and may help reduce the rubbing or dragging sensation that can happen when there isn't quite enough natural lubrication.
Lube is particularly useful for anal sex because the anus doesn't naturally lubricate itself.
If something hurts, though, don't keep adding more lube and push through it. Pain is your body telling you something needs to change, whether that's the position, pace, activity or something that needs further attention.
It can make things feel better
For some people, the extra glide simply makes sex more enjoyable.
There is some research suggesting lubricant can improve sexual comfort and wellbeing, although the evidence base isn't huge. You don't really need a scientific reason to use it anyway. If you like how it feels, that's reason enough.
It can make inserting cups, discs and pelvic health products easier
A tiny amount of lube can be really useful when you're learning to insert a menstrual cup or menstrual disc.
It may also help with products such as vaginal dilators and pelvic floor trainers.
The trick is not to overdo it. Too much lubricant can make a cup or disc slippery and harder to hold while you're trying to position it.
If insertion regularly hurts, though, more lube isn't necessarily the answer. Pelvic floor tension, vaginal dryness, irritation or conditions such as vaginismus can all make insertion uncomfortable.
Our guides to painful intercourse and pelvic floor relaxation may help.
It can make toys glide more easily
Lube can make many toys more comfortable to use too.
Just check the toy instructions first. Some lubricant ingredients don't play nicely with certain materials, particularly some silicone toys.
It can make talking about comfort easier
There's also something refreshingly straightforward about reaching for the lube and saying, βThis would feel better with a little more slip.β
It can open up a conversation about pace, pressure and what feels good.
Lube doesn't replace communication or consent, of course. Anyone can pause, change what they're doing or stop at any time.
When might you use lubricant?
Really, whenever you want extra glide.
That might be:
- during vaginal or anal sex
- during masturbation
- with compatible toys
- when inserting a menstrual cup or disc
- when using a dilator or pelvic floor device
- when hormonal changes are causing vaginal dryness
- during perimenopause or menopause
- while breastfeeding
- or simply because you prefer how it feels
There doesn't need to be a problem to solve.
Which type of lubricant should you choose?
There are a few main types, and each has its pros and cons.
| Type | With latex condoms | What to know |
|---|---|---|
| Water-based | β Generally compatible | Versatile and easy to wash off. It may dry out sooner, so you might need to reapply. |
| Silicone-based | β Generally compatible | Longer-lasting, but check compatibility with silicone toys or devices. |
| Oil-based | β No | Oil can weaken latex condoms and may not suit some toys or internal products. |
| Hybrid | β οΈ Check the label | Formulas vary, so check whether it contains silicone or oil and what it can be used with. |
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If you want to get into the differences between ingredients, sensitive-skin options and specific formulations, our guide toΒ choosing the right personal lubricant goes into more detail.
Which lubricants can you use with condoms?
If you're using latex condoms, stick with a lubricant labelled as condom-compatible.
Water-based and silicone-based lubricants are generally the safest options with latex condoms.
Avoid oil-based products, including things such as petroleum jelly and massage oils, because oil can weaken latex and make the condom more likely to break.
If you're using a non-latex condom, check the packet because compatibility depends on what the condom is made from.
Lube itself doesn't prevent pregnancy or sexually transmitted infections. If contraception is important to you, see our guide to contraception options in Australia.
Can you use lube with a menstrual cup or disc?
Usually, yes, and it can be especially handy while you're learning.
A small amount of water-based lubricant around the vaginal opening or on the insertion edge of the cup or disc can make insertion easier.
Don't coat the whole product. You still need to be able to hold onto it.
It's also best to check the manufacturer's instructions before using silicone-based or oil-based lubricant with a silicone cup or disc. Compatibility varies between products.
If you're practising with a new cup or disc, our dry run guide can help.
What about vaginal dilators and pelvic floor devices?
Lubricant can make these products more comfortable to insert, but follow the instructions supplied with the device and any advice from your healthcare professional.
This is particularly important if you're using a product because of pelvic pain, vaginismus, recent surgery or postpartum recovery.
You shouldn't need to force a device into place. If it causes significant pain or bleeding, stop and get advice before continuing.
What if you're trying to conceive?
Some laboratory studies have found that certain lubricants can affect the way sperm move.
That doesn't automatically mean using ordinary lubricant will make it harder to become pregnant, but if you're actively trying to conceive, you may prefer a product specifically tested and labelled as sperm-friendly or fertility-friendly.
If you're having difficulty conceiving or aren't sure what to use, your GP or fertility specialist can give you more individual advice.
What if sex is still uncomfortable even with lube?
Lube is brilliant for reducing friction, but it can't fix every reason sex might hurt.
Persistent discomfort can be related to things such as:
- vaginal dryness
- pelvic floor muscle tension
- vaginismus
- vulval irritation or skin conditions
- infection
- hormonal changes during perimenopause or menopause
- some medicines or medical treatments
If sex regularly hurts, it's worth talking with a GP, sexual health clinician or pelvic health physiotherapist.
You should also get medical advice if you notice bleeding during or after sex, unusual discharge, ongoing itching or burning or another new symptom.
Our guides to vaginismus, vaginal health in perimenopause and talking to a doctor about vaginal concerns may help.
A little lube can go a long way
Lube doesn't need to be something you reach for only when there's a problem.
It can simply make things smoother, more comfortable and more enjoyable.
Water-based lubricant is a versatile place to start, particularly if you're using condoms, menstrual cups, discs or pelvic health products. From there, the best choice comes down to what you're using it with and what feels good for you.
If something causes burning, itching or irritation, stop using it. And if sex or insertion keeps hurting even with lubricant, it's worth finding out why rather than simply adding more.
To compare your options, read our guide to choosing the right personal lubricant or browse Period Shop's lubricants.
For more practical information about periods and pelvic health, explore our Period Care and Pelvic Health Guides.
Sources and further reading
- Australian Government Department of Health: STI prevention
- NSW Health Play Safe: Lube
- Jean Hailes: Painful sex
- Your Fertility: Lubricants when trying to conceive
- Kennedy et al. Lubricants for the promotion of sexual health and well-being: a systematic review
This article provides general information and isn't a substitute for individual healthcare advice.